awakening

Time flies. It’s been almost a month since I last posted anything in here. With the rate I am going, I may either have to spend more time here or close this blog down altogether! On that note, I do hope that I still can afford the time and energy needed to account for what has been happening in my life.

I’ve been through moments of what seems like a process of mind awakening. Of late, the sermons and sharing in church have awakened my spiritual mind and have started my bout of self examination. We were enlightened on the End Times through a series of sermons, and the severity of it really shook me. God is gracious, but would I be found worthy and deserving in his sight?

On further revelations, I wondered if I would succumb to the temptations of the world just to “survive, trade and exchange”, or if I was resolute enough to stand firm for my faith and run the race till the very end. A brother mentioned that he wanted to be around to witness the end. I’m not very sure if I want to.

The reason why I have been not updating this little space here can be attributed to my list of commitments. I may not be the busiest person around, but I do feel weary and tired. Thoughts of quitting went through my mind. I wanted to drop everything, I wanted to go Home early. I was really close to pulling out of VOX ministry and PA ministry too, until I heard last week’s sermon.

And then I realised the importance of committing my life unto the Lord. I was weary serving out of my limited and burdened heart. I suddenly felt as if I was shortchanging God. Rather than thanking God for His blessings and the favor He had blessed me with, I was grumpy while serving for the 5 consecutive weeks of services. I went with a willing heart, but allowed minor things to come my way.

There is really a need for me to deal with these issues and deal with my inadequacies. While praying on a fine Monday morning, I felt as if God was telling me this.

“Ask and you shall receive. Seek and you shall find. Lean not on your own understanding, but by the grace of God.” What an affirmation indeed. In the midst of my prayers for others, God was ministering to me.

On another hand, my current Godsend job is yet another mind opening experience. Having been given the opportunity to try several things, I have come to realise more about myself. I have a clearer picture of my strengths and weaknesses, all thanks to my God given boss and colleagues. While audio engineering remains my forte and passion, I must say that I have discovered my flair for writing.

Being in this job has exposed me to simply more and more. Indeed, life is always a learning journey. Having come to see more of the society through my job, I can only say that I am awed by the experience and thankful for the doors that have been opened.

I’m prayerfully considering freelancing as a soundman for experience and portfolio’s sake. Unless the Lord leads, I doubt I will tie myself down to any more commitments.

Nonetheless, I believe all my experiences here have drawn me even closer to the people. To all the wonderful folks out there (you really know who you are!), thanks for always being a part of my life. The road may be long and narrow but we can be confident of our completion.