Try as I might I dare not reveal myself. Will this be a slippery slope down to insanity? What ifs. So much doubts fill my mind, cloud my vision. What ifs.
The possible repercussions fill my mind. Like a playwright I rehearse the scenes over and over in my mind. Ending A? Cut. Ending B? Cut.
The final act is over. The lights are dimmed, and I take a bow. The curtains come down.
I must be objective, I tell myself. Let's do it the right way. Let's not rush into things. Let's take it step by step, I hear myself say.
Yet none of these help to suppress the overflowing emotions within me, nor give me a clear direction. I feel like a fool babbling away into nothingness.
O the times I spent thinking about it, pondering, thinking. The times I prayed about it, and felt peace. Then again...my heart's crippled by the veins I keep on closing.
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